purerockfury
Legendary Member
If you ever got told your lying through your tooth...
Your Favorite Jeff Foxworthy "Redneck" Jokes
- Thread starter Twelvefret
- Start date
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
Your idea of a seven course meal is KFC and a six pack.
Your wife’s best shoes have steel toes
Your wife’s best shoes have steel toes
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
"If you've ever been on television more than 5 times
describing what the tornado sounded like...
You might be a redneck. "
describing what the tornado sounded like...
You might be a redneck. "
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
More from Jeff
"If you want the phone to ring, sit down on the tolet"
"Do not unbutton your pants on the way to the bathroom as this alerts your bladder to open the flood gates".
"If you agree to follow someone in your car somewhere that you have no idea where you are going, it will cause them to run every yellow caution light on the way".
If you have a junk drawer, these item most likely are in that drawer,
1. One broken garage door opener
2. Five AA batteries that you don't know if charged or not
3. Expired coupons,
4. Four rubber bands
5. Three birthday candals
6. An empy pack of matches
7. An assortment of screws
8. A checkbook from a bank you no longer use
9. A combination lock and a key lock both you cannot unlock
10. Seven keys that go to who knows what?
11. The light bulb from a flashlight
12. Six business cards from people you do not know
13. Someone child in a cap and gown
14. Directions to a coffee maker you no longer have
13. One shoestring
14. One dead roach with its feet in the air
Feel free to add...
"If you want the phone to ring, sit down on the tolet"
"Do not unbutton your pants on the way to the bathroom as this alerts your bladder to open the flood gates".
"If you agree to follow someone in your car somewhere that you have no idea where you are going, it will cause them to run every yellow caution light on the way".
If you have a junk drawer, these item most likely are in that drawer,
1. One broken garage door opener
2. Five AA batteries that you don't know if charged or not
3. Expired coupons,
4. Four rubber bands
5. Three birthday candals
6. An empy pack of matches
7. An assortment of screws
8. A checkbook from a bank you no longer use
9. A combination lock and a key lock both you cannot unlock
10. Seven keys that go to who knows what?
11. The light bulb from a flashlight
12. Six business cards from people you do not know
13. Someone child in a cap and gown
14. Directions to a coffee maker you no longer have
13. One shoestring
14. One dead roach with its feet in the air
Feel free to add...
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
It’s been a minute or two since I posted.
If you ask the officer to hold your beer while you look for your vehicle registration, you might be a red neck.
If your dog and your wallet at both on a chain, you might be a redneck.
If your wife asks you to remove a transmission so she can take a bath, you might be a redneck.
If you ask the officer to hold your beer while you look for your vehicle registration, you might be a red neck.
If your dog and your wallet at both on a chain, you might be a redneck.
If your wife asks you to remove a transmission so she can take a bath, you might be a redneck.
Last edited:
DesertIguana
Legendary Member
Jeff had a CD why you might be REDNECK, Truck Stops sold, it made Jeff money. Being a Redneck is not a bad thing, they mostly work, are good employees, and are not troubled people.
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
What gave Jeff credibility was that he resembled one and was able to laugh at himself. Unless you have some direct experience, the joke is meaningless. One I recall that always cracks me up is, "If you think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy, you might be a redneck".
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
Me to.
DesertIguana
Legendary Member
Jeff & Larry the Cable Guy both do the same type of humor.
Twelvefret
Forum GOD!
If the Salvation Army refuses your furniture, you might be a red neck.
if you gave someone the shirt off your back and they didn’t want it, you might be a redneck.
if you have been in a custody battle over a hunting dog, you might be a red neck.
if you gave someone the shirt off your back and they didn’t want it, you might be a redneck.
if you have been in a custody battle over a hunting dog, you might be a red neck.
purerockfury
Legendary Member
If you ever cut your lawn and find a car, you might be a redneck...
If your son goes to your 8th grade graduation... you might be a redneck...
If your son goes to your 8th grade graduation... you might be a redneck...